In The Buff (Socks LXX)

"Humans would never listen to you losers."
"So, they would listen to you?"
Two pretended to ignore the question.
Light came through the curtains, and the humans carried their plates into the kitchen.
Lar had never seen humans without clothes.
"It's called naked." Dick explained. He had seen this occurrence occasionally throughout his years on the shelf. Usually early in the morning.
"Maybe you can talk to Dad," Rar said to Two.
Two snubbed Rar, but when the humans came through the room, Two yelled "Hey."
Dad breezed past.
The others laughed.
Mom stopped walking, and turned toward the shelf.

Hark (Socks LXIX)

Dick stopped laughing. "Mom is listening to us."
"So?"
"Remember when she found Libbey? She didn't listen then."
"When Mom fixed my toe, she said, "You look good now," then rubbed the sore spot."
"She talked to me when she sewed my heel, too."
"Dad talked to me when he put me up here with you guys," Nick added.
"Humans talk to objects quite often," Dick said, "but seldom listen."
"They listen to me all the time," SONY said.
"Not the same thing."
"What does this mean?"
"It means you're all lowlifes."
"Lowlife is synonymous with troublemaker, that fits you."

Two Returns (Socks LXVIII)

Dad carried one plate of eggs, bacon, and toast through the room. On the way back from the bedroom he set the trophy back on the shelf. He grabbed another plate of food and headed to the bedroom.
"I'm gonna keep an eye on you this time, fuzzy."
"You should. I get the chance, I'll shove you off again."
"Rar, ignore Two. He's got the disposition of a dime," Nick said.
"Disposition? That's a big word, Nick. You've been listening to Dick."
"Sure have. He's smart. Smart enough to like Oprah."
Everybody laughed, except Two.
"Dad, listen."
"Listen to what?"

Cheering Things (Socks LXVII)

Mom was sitting up in the bed when Dad put Two in her hands.
"Second place. Not bad."
"Thanks."
"723. Is that pins or beers?"
"Neither; barmaids."
"You wish."
"Tell you what Mom, you stay here, I'll make us breakfast in bed."
"If your not too tired from all those barmaids."
"I have a little energy left."
As Dad walked into the kitchen, the humans talked louder.
"Scrambled eggs ok?"
"Just right. What do you plan to do with this trophy?"
"I think I'll put it on the bookcase downstairs in the rec room."
"I just heard that applause again."

Hearing Things (Socks LXVI)

Thump.
"What was that?"
"I'll go check it out."
Dad touched the lamp and the bulb sprang into action. "My bowling trophy fell off the shelf."
"I heard applause."
"All I heard was a bump. Maybe your clock-radio is on."
Dad picked Two from the floor and set him on the shelf.
"The radio's off. Bring that trophy in here, I want to see it again."
Dad grabbed Two and started for the bedroom.
"There it goes again"
"What?"
"I heard applause again."
"You must be hearing things," Dad muttered.
"I heard that."
"You always do."
The lights went out.

Eviction (Socks LXV)

Who did these jokers think they were? Two ran with winners. Two was a winner.
"You're all losers. At lest I got second place. You got no place."
"We were getting along quite well, before you got here," Dick said.
"Wasn't my idea to hang out with you lowlifes."
While Two was bickering with Dick, Rar got behind him and pushed. Two was heavier, stronger, but slower. He tried to get out of the way. Rar had the jump on him.
Rar pushed throughout the night. Just before daybreak, Two lost his balance, tumbling from the shelf.
Cheers went up.

Two (Socks LXIV)

"Bingo genius, I'm a trophy. How'd ya guess?"
"I didn't guess."
"OK wise guy, what is it that I do?"
"You are a token or remembrance of success."
"Think you're pretty smart, don't ya?"
"He is smart," Nick claimed.
"Butt out. Who asked for your two cents?"
"Five."
"What're you talking about?"
"I'm worth five. What are you worth?"
"A lot. Man, I only hang with the best."
"Looks like you hang with second best," Rar piped in.
Everyone laughed except the trophy, and SONY repeated the conversation.
Dick said, "We should call him Two."
The whole business irritated Two.